Tags: horrorscope

are you the key?

trip of power! and possibly doom.

From astro.com:

Welcome to AstroClick Travel!

AstroClick Travel is designed as an introduction to locational astrology. Its use is meant for entertainment, and maybe you would like to test certain "influences" on a holiday trip.

The meaning of Astro-Maps:

- Astro maps show lines which at the time of birth were strongly influenced by a planet. Should you come into contact with these power zones, parts of your personality can be more intensively activated.

- A stay at such localities is not necessarily required to activate these energies. People as well as spiritual and cultural influences which emanate from these geographical regions form an energetic link.

- The strongest influence is directly on one of these lines. However, the orb of influence extends to a distance of at least 250 km (150 miles) from the line.

- Power zones also exist where planetary lines cross. The energies involved influence each other. This is also true for lines which are close together. The energies of a crossing can be felt - although in a weaker form - throughout the world along the same line of latitude.

- Even in zones where there is no apparent line, an influential connection may still exist. There could be an aspect to a main axis, or the region may be located on a line of latitude where planetary line cross and exert a somewhat diminished effect.

- Transits and other astrological time events can intensify the effect of these lines and should be taken into account.

Right, ok. So I'm going on a trip, so I put in a request to see my lines for Europe, and:

Tunis & Croatia are on the light blue line; and the red and green lines both pass through Malaga, Spain. I might implode before we even hit Casablanca......

ETA: holy crap, the US map is like reading an exact record of my life. scaree!


I am looking in my livejournal archives of the account I deleted to find more information on novel ideas. I found this entry:

2005-08-02 10:45:00


When the girl Friday calls at 7 am to wake up the whole household and you get up to make lemon zucchini bread while listening to nine inch nails, is trent really speaking to you, or do you just need to reclaim your life?

I feel like giving that poor past-me a big hug and telling her: Both.

It's funny, but after my dream last night, I should be melancholy over that, but I am just a little rueful and deeply content.

ETA: holy shit, look at this one:

2005-09-13 16:37:45

creepy horoscope

I signed up to have my horoscope delivered to my flist and today it said:

You are being indecisive. Look backward and forward and you'll realize the one place you don't want to be is in the present. You need a change and you're running out of time.

I don't know if I'm crazy, but I feel total overwhelming panic when I look at that! The stars say I am running out of time?! Aaaahhhh! How much time do I have?! TILL WHAT?!
never be ashamed

dese iz RULEZ

The Baron's Horoscopes RULE ALL. I will attend one of his classes here in Portland if it is the last thing I do here. The Baron's explanation for the horrorscopes this week:


In honor of the socio-sexual nature of the last week of Libra, the Baron tells it like it is about the 12 tribes of the zodiac. You know in your heart you've always wanted it. It's time for (w)horoscopes, bitches!

Because I am fair-minded, here is my gem:

Libra: Place-Holder

You are a co-dependent weakling. You don't always get attached to one person, and may even spend periods of time alone, but you're rarely able to function effectively without someone else to define you. You romanticize your psychological dependence on people in order to justify your relationships and make your partners feel special when they are often just place-holders. Try seeing yourself without another person.

Harsh, yes, but so very, very, true. The good news for me: I *am* trying to see myself without another person! And barring occasional freak-outs, one is a number I am learning to live with very happily.

Because The Baron told me so (well, not so much, but whatever), here are my last two disasters, documented in loving cruelty, and utterly, perfectly on the mark:

Gemini: Cut the Inner Dialogue

You are not that interesting. Your thoughts are not that important. I know that you are interest-ed in getting to know yourself better, but that's because you are a shattered mirror of a person, and hope that by gazing at your reflection in each and every sharpened fragment you will someday regain unity. As exciting as your psychological odyssey may be to you, it bores the shit out of your loved and liked ones to hear you narrate the pointless conversations that go on within your head. Get out of your narcissistic self dialogue and speak to the people in your life like they're something other than an audience for your inner drama.

Cancer: No Use Crying Over Poured Milk

Take a step back. You have a dream of being able to pour yourself endlessly into another person, and having them pour back into you. Like water exchanged to and fro between two (of) cups. This wet dream leaves no place for any independence or identity from the relationship. It is almost impossible to extricate water from one cup that's been poured into another. Some of your dreams of losing your ego into other people are romanticized escapism and a premature mysticism. Wanting independence from the relationship does not mean that they don't care. It means that they are normal, healthy, and sane, and want to stay that way.

Happy birthday to me! Clicky here to look up your horrorscope! You know you want to!
sell crazy

tarot.com, making friends & breaking hearts

Love Horoscope for the Week of:
Monday, September 10, 2007

Selfishness is not your style, but should be practiced this weekend. Instead of simply being open to others, carefully measure what you are getting and what you are willing to give in return. You are worth more than you generally assume, and it's time to make better deals for yourself.

I know you think that's funny, but wait, it gets better!

Monday, September 10th, 2007 PST
Libra (Sep 23 - Oct 22)

The Moon in your 12th House of Secrets can reveal hidden emotions now, but others still won't be aware of your internal process. They will merely see the results of your inner work and not the anguish you experience along the way. If you run into unexpected negative judgments from those who normally support you, don't try to change their minds. They will come around as they learn more about your thoughts.

Ok, stupid stars, you'd better be right, and stuff. You might be like the universe or whatever, but at some point ya gotta stop jerking a girl around....
cow of pain

oh so funny.

Amanda's Horoscope:

Your key planet Venus has been buzzed by the electric planet Uranus for the past several days, leaving you a bit anxious and maybe even tired. Your desires are not within your control and might not be as socially acceptable as you'd like. Keep in mind that you don't need to ask for everything that you want. Self-restraint will work in your favor.

Tarot.com, bringing on the hits.

Fudge recipe seems to have worked. I almost regret knowing that all one needs to make fudge is chocolate chips, condensed milk, and a microwave. A quarter cup of amaretto in the mix, however, might have been a tad much....because the fudge bites back. Or maybe it is just right.....
cow of pain


Horrorscope for today:

Libra (Sep 23 - Oct 22)

This is a hard phase for you as you are drawn into other people's battles. It's not that you don't want to help -- you do and you do it well. It's just that the metaphysical lightning strikes and all of a sudden the sky lights up so you see the whole picture quite clearly. You may realize that if you don't take care of your own needs, you won't have anything to give to others. Make changes in your priorities to bring your life into balance.

Yeah. Thanks, tarot.com, for once again smacking me upside the head.